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Summarize your life in six words. Not on our list? Add it to the comments:
A series of ups and downs.
Birth–series of meaningless events–death.
Started badly, but improving over time.
Seen too much, waiting to die.
Who? What? When? Where? and WHY?
Hurry up, get anxious, wait forever.
Thought i was wrong; was right.
Bipolar, unmotivated, going …
Most Embarassing Question… you can ask a woman.
What do you mean, ‘is it in yet?’
Are you a girl?
Are you pregnant? (when not)
Did you just queef?
How often do you masturbate?
Is that my kid?
Did you notice chocolate pudding spots on your pants?
Are you being a bitch or is your period coming?
Where do …
The first case of homosexual necrophilia in the mallard Anas platyrhynchos (Aves: Anatidae) by C.W. (Kees) Moeliker
On 5 June 1995 an adult male mallard (Anas platyrhynchos) collided with the glass façade of the Natuurhistorisch Museum Rotterdam and died. An other drake mallard raped the corpse almost continuously for 75 minutes. …
How to be a man… suave and debonair. Recommendations:
Instead of doing the dishes, use a CD spindle’s plastic cover as a cereal bowl.
Out of toilet paper? Wipe your rear with a pair of socks and toss ‘em.
Multitask: Eat sandwich and piss simultaneously.
Don’t vacume the carpet for a a year, then …
Confessions from strangers #1:
When I was eight years old, I received the Guinness book of world records for Christmas. I vividly remember a picture of the guy with the world’s longest fingernails: he had these long, curling, writhing, cumbersome, spirals that extended from his fingertips. I thought to myself, “I’m still pretty young.
…
Put eight monkeys in a room. In the middle of the room is a ladder, leading to a bunch of bananas hanging from a hook on the ceiling.
Each time a monkey tries to climb the ladder, all the monkeys are sprayed with ice water, which makes them miserable. Soon enough, …
Looks like people walked out of Bruno. Walking out of Bruno? What did you expect to see when you bought those tickets? Here are some funny quotes from around the net:
“Just walked out of Bruno. Awful awful movie”
“I never walk out of movies. Seriously walked out of Bruno.”…
Complaining that we’re out of ___insert product here___ is not going to magically create more that we can sell to you.
No, I am not going to fix your computer (for free). No, I am not going to design your website (for free), …
[trakor75] I hate how asians always forget like a, an, the, etc, whatever those are called(prepositions?)
[trakor75] my malaysian friend always does that
[trakor75] I had to totally rewrite her resume
[@c|oneman] I veiry talented, have lot of sperience
[trakor75] there would be no I or of
[TrAiNsZ] i get job in supplies
[`Socrates] prepositions?
[`Socrates] ::FACEPALM::
[TrAiNsZ]
…
